An Inverted Y Axis Detour

Here at IYA, we dabble in many other things other than video games. Aith rides his bike, Poops landscapes, Tag plays hockey, and Fenris… Fenris-es. So without further ado, we present some random thoughts.

With the big election in the near future, I’m reminded of one of the things that really chaps my caboose: the straight-party vote. In Poopsville - where I rule with absolute power, the Dallas Cowboys never lose a game, OU never wins a game, A&M is not a cult, and the Texas Rangers… well, let’s be honest, not even an imaginary utopia can fix the pitching problems – the boxes for straight-party votes are connected to pressure sensitive switches that when activated propel the “voter” into my own little Great Pit of Carkoon. In these depths, one will not have to deal with being digested over a thousand years. No, no, sweet friends. Mercy will not follow into those depths. Instead, the pit will be filled with ravenous, carnal creatures ready to violate every orifice in your body with whatever appendage they deem apt for the task.

Why such the anger towards the straight-party vote? Why subject people exercising their civic duty to such awful creatures? To me, the straight-party vote indicates one of three things to me:

· Being unfamiliar to all the candidates

· Having a selfish desire for a “team win”

· Having a closed mind and thinking that candidates from the other parties couldn’t possibly be better than the worst from your chosen party.

The first reason is understandable. Often there are several elections going on at a time, and it’s ok to not know everything about every candidate. The second rationale is despicable. Elections are not about bragging to your golf buddies about how one party won and the other party lost. They’re about choosing leaders of the country, heads of government, or in the Dallas ISD’s case, which superintendent can best fuck up a budget - certainly not things to be cast casually aside in favor of some selfish yearning to see your team win. The third option is possibly the most loathsome of all. The political system has evolved so much recently with sub-parties and cross-over candidates that it is ridiculous to think that some one with an R or a D by their name cannot possibly compare to an I candidate.

My proposed solution: if you don’t know, don’t vote. I’m of the opinion that an uninformed vote is far worse than not voting at all. I encourage people to be informed and to cast their ballot. Don’t pull a France maneuver and just give your vote up to every candidate in the same party as the one you do know something about. With all the terrible candidates elected in the past, such actions are truly careless and dangerous.

God, I need to go play some video games.